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A Witch's Path. . .

a path worth taking. . .

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Motivation

Change is hard…

So, a lot of you know that I have type 2 diabetes. Over the last 10 years ive been hospitalized 5 times in DKA (diabetic kedoacidosis). Some of you dont realize that DKA can be deadly if not treated immediately and appropriately. I could blame biology, I could blame stress (I have in the past), but the reality is that I need to make a change. I need to change the way I eat, the way I live and the way I see myself.
Most of you also know that I consider myself a spiritual person. I’m not spiritual enough. I’m not sure if I lack the stamina or the guts to devote myself wholly to me. I believe type 2 diabetes can be cured. I want to get rid of it. I will get rid of it. I was going in thw right direction but was thrown off track. Not by anyone but myself. I have accepted that and I am owning it.
Change is undeniably difficult for everyone, 2pac was right, we need to make these changes. I’m tired of being tired,  I’m tired of hating selfies, I’m tired of eating garbage, most of all I’m tired of making excuses for myself.
So . . . Cheers to a new beginning.

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My absence . . . again

Pentagram with a circle around it

English: Wicca Blessing Symbol

 

 

My dearest friends and readers,

I know that I have been away for a while with minimum posts and few communications. I would really like to thank those of you who have continually checked in on my blog. Life has been giving me the usual ups and downs.  The difference is that life is going pretty well for me. I feel as though the reason is because I found my path again. My life has always been surrounded by magik. No matter where I go, what life I lead, magik will manifest from nothing.

Some say Jesus makes these things happen, others say that God will never lead you astray. I like to say that life has a balance and its own energy. We all have our own energy and what we chose to do with it is up to each of us. Wicca is the path I chose many years ago when I was trying to find my way.

Work has definitely been good to me. My job is turning in to my life and I love it! My employer is amazing and my co-workers are just as much. I can truly see myself here for a long time to come. Everyday I’m inspired to grow and move on up in the world.

Hector is well, I am well, we became pet parents in January to a beautiful Chorkie who I named Charlie Tango. Yes, he is named after a fictional Helicopter owned by the Fictional character Christian Grey in the love trilogy Fifty Shades of Grey.

Just wanted you all to have a little update . . . I have so much more to say but it’s so late 😦 I’ll be back this weekend after the holiday.

Many Blessings!
D

Giving up?

Do you ever get bored? I don’t mean, “I have nothing to do bored”. . . I’m talking about, bored with your partner, bored with your hair, bored with your friends (or lack-thereof), bored with your job, bored with everything, nothing arouses your interest?

I love my job. I enjoy working with the people, I enjoy interacting with our clients. Is it bad that I don’t find it interesting anymore?

I sometimes wonder if there is something wrong with me, lately everything just seems so blah. It’s as if the young vibrant and excited me is gone for good and I’ve been replaced of a shadow of who I used to be. I used to love life. I used to live it to its full potential! What happened to me?

I try and think of things that will make me go YES!!! but nothing seems to get me going these days. I’m so anxious like I need to run and never look back. I wasn’t meant to be tied down.

I have no idea what this means or where this will lead me but I feel like I’m giving up.

Don’t give up. . .

There are times when no matter what you do, or how hard you try at something you just can’t seem to get it right. It is in those times that you must stop take a deep breath and remind yourself that it’s okay to lose a small battle or for the other team to score. You have to remember that life isn’t about winning or about being perfect. Life is about never EVER giving up. So your ten year plan turned into a 12 year plan, it’s a plan nonetheless. For the past two years, I have fought hard to work a full time job, go to school full time and have a full time relationship with someone who is not easy to be around sometimes. Today after four long hours of HW and finishing touches on my final, I realize that I may not pass my very first college course. Statistics kicked my freaking ass. I wanted to cry, I told myself “I’m good at math, this should have been easy” The truth is, Statistics is not easy, and math is only a small part of it. There is a lot of problem solving involved. I should have gotten ahead before I had the chance to get behind. I should not have procrastinated reading the chapters. Looking back over the last five weeks I could have been on Facebook a little less. I could have put off my ancestry search for another class. I could have put off Reading the second to the last book in the Sookie Stackhouse series for one more week. But did I? NO, I DID NOT!

So here I am, certain that I failed this class and there is nothing at this point that I can do about it. The only thing left to do is, hope that my darling gets a job in the next month or so. This way I can make payments toward retaking the class. Giving up is not an option especially because the failure was my own in every which way. Maybe I really just did need a long break. It’s hard going to school and working full time. This is the first class I thought I had in the bag that I was completely off about.

I’ll tell you one thing, I’m sure that the next time I go head to head with statistics, I’m going to show it exactly what I’m made of. I have to, quitting is not an option. Failing at my own dreams is not an option. I just have to work that much harder now to reach my goals. Shame on me. Shame on me for putting something in front what what should have been the very most important thing in my life. Shame on me for not putting me first.

So, what’s left, work, save money, work on my health and weight and mind until I have the money to continue my journey to being  D. Marlene Rodriguez, Ph.D. (or Psy.D.)

Why would you believe the sky is the limit, when there is an entire galaxy out there, just beyond the clouds. . .

The Beginning

So, I got up this morning at 5 AM jogged 3 miles in 32 minutes, the average is 1 mile for ten minutes so I did fairly well. Tonight I I will start this walk routine I found at a page called Green, Healthy and Fit. See Below.Image

This is so doable and I thank you so much Green, Healthy and Fit for posting this.

10 Ways to Find Time for Exercise

What’s the No. 1 excuse for not working out? Lack of time. Sure, we’re all busy handling multiple priorities and rushing around from here and there every day. However, I promise that no matter how busy you are, someone even busier than you are is working out right now. If you look closer, you’ll discover that you do have the time to work out—and you deserve to use that time for yourself.

Squeezing in just a few minutes of physical exercise a day has huge benefits on your health, gives you energy and perks up your mood. In fact, a new study published by The Lancet found that if inactive people increased their physical activity by just 15 minutes per day, they could reduce their risk of premature death by 14% and increase their life expectancy by three years.  Also, remember that “working out” doesn’t have to happen in the gym or last for an hour! Short 10-minute bursts of exercise, accumulated over the course of the day, can add up to big fitness and health gains, too.

Still not convinced that you have the time to exercise? Here’s how to start fitting fitness into your busy life today!

10 Practical Tips to Fit Fitness into Your Busy Life

1. Wake up earlier. Sleep is definitely important for overall health and weight-loss, but could you hit the sheets just 30 minutes earlier, so that you could get up and work out before your day starts? Working out in the morninghas numerous benefits including regulating appetite, boosting energy and—perhaps the biggest benefit of all—an A.M. sweat session ensures that your workout is checked off first thing each day! Because really, how many times have you had the best intentions to exercise in the evening, only to have to work late, help your kids with a project or generally just feel too exhausted to get off the couch? With morning workouts, the time problem is solved!

2. Cut down on media. For just a few days, record how much time you spend surfing the Internet, checking personal email, watching TV and playing video games whether it’s on your computer or your phone. You just might be surprised at how much time you spend on Facebook or playing Angry Birds. Just a few minutes here and there can add up to an hour or more each day. Cut out just some of that screen time and, voila, you suddenly have time to squeeze in at least 10 or 15 minutes of exercise into even the busiest day.

3. Be an active TV watcher. It’s unrealistic to never watch TV or to shun the Internet forever (how would you get your SparkPoints fix?).  So when you do, try to incorporate some physical activity. When watching TV, make it a point to do some jumping jacks or push-ups during commercials. Doing a little exercise during the commercial breaks can add up to almost 20 minutes of fitness for every hour of TV you watch. And instead of sitting in a chair when on the computer, try sitting on a stability ball or stack your computer up on some books so that you have a standing desk to surf from. No matter how you do it, try not to sit for more than 20 minutes at a time!

4. Try an active commute. One of the best ways to fit exercise into your life is by incorporating it into your school or work transportation routine. If you live close enough, consider biking to work. If you take the bus, walk to a bus stop that’s an extra block or two away, or get off the bus a stop sooner than usual and get a few more steps in. And if you drive to work, park as far away as you can—even a few blocks away, if possible.

5.  Make it part of your routine. One reason it’s so challenging to fit exercise into a busy schedule is because we’re not used to doing it. Heck, it takes time to brush your teeth in the morning, but you do it, don’t you? You brush your teeth every day because it’s important and because it’s almost second nature to get up and do it. Start making some form of exercise—whether it’s walking the dog, doing 10 minutes of yoga or going for a bike ride after dinner—a daily tradition, just like showering, brushing your teeth or hitting the coffee shop on the way to work. It’s easy to fit in exercise for a few days here or there, but by incorporating it into your daily routine like you would your hygiene, you take the process of working out away from willpower and into habit. Need help getting into the habit? Try SparkGuy’s Daily Workout Streak Challenge!

6. Mix socializing with exercising. Do you normally spend time with your family or friends by going to dinner, watching sports on TV or going to movies? Make your social time more active by planning events that get all of you moving. Go for a family hike on a beautiful Saturday morning, play a game of tag football with your buddies during halftime, or make a date with your significant other or best friend on the treadmill. There are so many options for squeezing more activity into your social calendar!

7. Turn chores into exercise. While cleaning might not be the most fun activity, it’s something we all have to do, and it can definitely be a workout if you want it to be. Set a kitchen timer for 20 minutes and see how much of the house you can clean. Try to be as efficient and quick-paced as possible, and I guarantee you’ll work up a sweat. If you’re doing lighter housework that is harder to get your heart rate up (like laundry or organizing), throw in some lunges or push-ups every few minutes to start feeling the burn!

8. Schedule an appointment. If you had scheduled a doctor’s appointment, you wouldn’t miss it would you? How about that important business meeting? Of course not. Working out is actually as important as going to the doctor or any other obligation that you prioritize, because it helps you perform better as a worker, parent, student or volunteer, and keeps you in tip-top shape. So whether it’s scheduling in an hour to go to that group exercise class, investing in personal training sessions or even making a date with yourself to do that workout DVD over your lunch break, write it in pen in your calendar and treat it like any other appointment you can’t miss!

9. Find an activity you love. Think of your favorite hobby or pastime. Do you have trouble finding time to do it? Most likely, you make time for it because you enjoy it so much. It’s the things we don’t enjoy that we put off and don’t feel bad about missing. That’s why it’s best to choose a physical activity that you actually enjoy and look forward to. Not only are you more likely to do it, but it also adds more fun into your life. And we all could use some more fun in our busy lives, right?

10. Say no. If you’ve gone through this entire list of tips and don’t think a single one will work in your life, then it’s time to look at your priorities and responsibilities. Do you really have to bake cookies for that fundraiser? Babysit for your sister? Take on that extra project at work? Attend that wedding shower of your second cousin? Remember that there’s nothing wrong in saying no. Yes, we all have obligations to others, but don’t forget about the obligation you have to yourself to take care of your body and your health!

Remember, exercise gives you energy and keeps you healthy to keep going in that busy life of yours! So don’t think of exercise as another to-do to squeeze in on your already busy schedule. Instead, think of it as maintenance for your health and a way to de-stress and do something for you!

Retrieved from: http://www.sparkpeople.com/resource/fitness_articles.asp?id=1675

Sickness shows us what we are

Shortly after turning 15 I started noticing changes in myself that I was not happy with at all. The number one thing that make me cringe was the fact that no matter how many salads I ate or how many calories I counted, I was gaining weight. Looking at my family history and digging deeper didn’t even occur to me since I wasn’t close to any of my family really. At the time I chalked it up to stress and kept doing what I was doing. By the time I was 19 and according to the chart at the doctors office I was about 40 lbs overweight. I didn’t feel “overweight”. I didn’t look “overweight”. According to the BMI chart on the wall my BMI was 30. It was absolutely ridiculous. The Doctor was telling me that my average weight should be 130-150. I hadn’t weighed 150 since I was 10 or 11. I was active, I was healthy and now I was miserable.

After a few months of pouting around, I did the one thing in my life I will regret forever: I gave up on me. My mom was fat, my dad was fat, my grandma’s were both fat. I was just destined to be fat. FAT FAT FAT FAT!!! Looking in the mirror I saw a big ball of lard. (Mind you I’m 5’4 and only weight 180 at the time.) I hated myself and just gave up.

The road to healthy is about changing how you see yourself and how you see your life. Changing your lifestyle is not an easy thing to do. I’ve gone from diet to diet pills, starving myself to purging, down to becoming a regular Crack/cocaine user. I have tried it all, I have done it all.

In November of 2008, I was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. I cried myself to sleep for weeks (including the 1 week I was in the hospital for DKA: Diabetic KetoAcidosis). My life as I knew it was over (at least in my mind). Here I was 23 years old with Diabetes. Doctor said “No drinking, no sweets, no pasta, no rice, no bread”. WTH WAS I SUPPOSED TO EAT?!!!!! He said “If you continue eating these things, you are going to die” I wanted to die. I wanted to crawl into a little hole and never be seen again. How embarrassing! I had the Fat disease!!! At least that is what I’d heard about it. “Only FAT people got diabetes.” “You keep eating all them sweets you’re going to get Diabetes.”

At 23 years old weighing in at 285 pounds I hated myself. I hated my life. When I went back to work from the hospital I had a lot of people supporting me and encouraging me to lose weight and eat healthy I gained a few walking partners. In 3 months I lost a total of 25 lbs. I still couldn’t look in the mirror because I could see the words FAT and DIABETES tattooed to my forehead. I couldn’t watch TV because there were all of these healthy SKINNY girls running around doing whatever it is that skinny girls

Diabetes is not a fat person disease. You don’t HAVE to dies from diabetes. If you do it’s because you chose to.

I was at the doctors last friday and I knew there was going to be bad news. For starters I’m now 27 and I weigh in at 260. She says to me “Donica, yours numbers are horrible, and that is the least of your problems.” I nod and turn my face to the floor, I did this, I am killing myself. “There is traces of sugar in your kidneys, this is very very dangerous. Sugar is poison to your kidneys. We have to get this sugar under control and your weight down. Your good cholesterol is very low. There is nothing we can do about that, it’s genetics. That just means you have to work THAT much harder to be healthy.” I nod and can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. “Donica, look at me, have you ever heard of PCOS, has anyone ever screened you for this?” I look up at my doctor and see a thin beautiful older woman who is seriously concerned about me. “No, I’ve never heard of this and as far as I know no one has ever screened me for it. What is PCOS?”

Turns out, “PCOS, or polycystic ovarian syndrome, is a common hormonal disorder in women that with interferes with the growth and release of eggs from the ovaries, or ovulation. It is the most common cause of infertility among women. PCOS occurs when a woman’s body overproduces sex hormones, called androgens. The hormone imbalance prevents fluid-filled sacs in the ovaries from breaking open and releasing mature eggs. The fluid-filled sacs bunch together, causing many tiny cysts. Symptoms of PCOS include missed periods, abnormal facial and body hair growth, acne, and weight gain. PCOS may run in families.” (WebMD)

Also according to Web MD early symptoms of PCOS include:

  • Few or no menstrual periodscamera. This can range from less than nine menstrual cycles in a year (more than 35 days between cycles) to no menstrual periods.2Some women with PCOS have regular periods but are not ovulating every month. This means that their ovaries are not releasing an egg each month.
  • Heavy, irregular vaginal bleeding. About 30% of women with PCOS have this symptom.3
  • Hair loss from the scalp and hair growth (hirsutism) on the face, chest, back,stomach, thumbs, or toes. About 70% of women in the United States with PCOS complain of these hair problems caused by high androgen levels.4
  • Acne and oily skin, caused by high androgen levels.
  • Depression or mood swings.

Living with PCOS symptoms can affect your sense of well-being, sexual satisfaction, and overall quality of life. This too can lead to depression.5 For more information, see the topic Depression or Depression in Children and Teens.

PCOS symptoms that may develop gradually include:

  • Weight gain or upper body obesity (more around the abdomen than the hips). This is linked to high androgen levels.4
  • Male-pattern baldness or thinning hair (alopecia). This is linked to high androgen levels.
  • Repeat miscarriages. The cause for this is not known. These miscarriages may be linked to high insulin levels, delayed ovulation, or other problems such as the quality of the egg or how the egg attaches to the uterus.
  • Inability to become pregnant (infertility). This is because the ovaries are not releasing an egg (not ovulating).
  • Symptoms of too much insulin (hyperinsulinemia) and insulin resistance, which can include upper body weight gain and skin changes, such as skin tags or dark, velvety skin patches under the arm, on the neck, or in the groin and genital area.
  • Breathing problems while sleeping (obstructive sleep apnea). This is linked to both obesity and insulin resistance.2

High blood pressure may be more common in women who have PCOS, especially if they are very overweight. Your doctor will check your blood pressure.

(http://women.webmd.com/tc/polycystic-ovary-syndrome-pcos-symptoms)

I have every symptom that is listed in this article and my doctor saw it right away. “We are going to start treating this. I’m going to start you back on Metformin at the lowest dosage to see how you react to it and a water pill to see if we can get some weight off of you. That sound okay?” I nod. Still taking in this new information. She also tells me she wants me to “cut-back on the whites, meaning bread, pasta rice. Have whole grain things. They are good for you.” Wait WHAT? you mean I don’t have to STOP eating my favorite foods?? (sweet)

Affirmations to myself for the rest of my life:

I am going to be okay.

I am going to become healthy.

I am going to change my lifestyle.

I am going to finish college.

I am going to become a PhD.

I am going to help children.

I AM GOING TO LIVE MY LIFE!

 

No more miss nice girl, no more pity party, no more being a victim of genes. I am going to live my life to the fullest. I am going to make changes immediately. I emptied out my pantry and fridge of all this crap I have been consuming and I have replaced it with everything that is healthy. I hear once that “Sickness shows us what we are” . . . Well, I’m going to show you.

Life Is Short

Marilyn Monroe once said, “I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they’re right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together”. This statement is undeniably true.

I could quote you a million different lines about life, change, motivation, relationships, family, religion or any other number of subjects, or topics if you will. You can pop one fortune cookie after the next but reaching your goals to make a better more valuable and rich life are up to you, or in this case me.

Everything does happen for a reason, you may not know what that reason is or where the road is going to take you but you don’t just stand there and do nothing. People change, everything changes. Learn to accept change because it is part of life and if you want to live you have to be able to adapt. You also need to accept that not everything is always going to go according to plan. I’m not saying don’t plan for things, but be flexible and again, be adaptable. Sometimes things are going to go wrong; sometimes they will go terribly wrong. Don’t get discouraged, in the words of Ayn Rand, “The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, and it is yours”. There are times when everything seems to just fall into place, cherish those times and by all means, share those times with the people in your life.

Honesty is an endangered species in the world these days. People lie all the time; most don’t even know they are doing it. Some people lie so much they can’t tell the truth from a lie anymore. Do NOT be one of those people; be honest because in the end you are only really lying to yourself. If you lie to yourself, then who can you trust if you can’t even trust yourself to be honest? Remember this: Everything that you say and do, can and will, affect the way people see you. Nothing ruins your reputation more than the own words spoken out of your mouth. Chances are if you can’t trust yourself to be honest, people won’t trust you and this leads to failed relationships in love, in family, in friends and in life.

Everything happens for a reason, things go wrong and good things fall apart. Learn to let go, accept and move on. People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. For the people who come into your life for a reason or a season, when the time is right and you are sure it’s time to let go, LET GO! As for the ones who are there for a lifetime, take care of them. Like a plant, water them, fertilize them and talk to them. Cherish and appreciate the things they do and the things they don’t do for you.

Life is short, love freely, smile and laugh often, have no regrets and leave no room for stagnation.


I’m a Believer. . .

A little over a year ago I started randomly blogging about my life as it was, the blogs were very few and far between. It all started with the following blog: http://wp.me/pVaD3-2q

Please feel free to recap on that. . .

Today, I look at my life, the life that I built with the choices I was offered. I can’t stop to wonder how things would have been because it’s a waste of time. I can only work hard to build the best future for me and my loved ones. I have learned many lessons along the way. I realize that nothing matters more than family, with all of their faults and quirks. No matter how much my Mother has neglected any part of us, she loves us. She has done the best she knew how. Which wasn’t much to begin with. She still tries to show us the way but it is usually not the way she means. LOL I’m half way away from having a degree in Psychology and My GPA is still an amazing 3.34 which is more than I can say for most. I still have issues, lol I probably always will. I still live with the only man who has ever been unconditional and been able to out up with my crap. February will be 8 years! I still can’t believe it sometimes, especially since I’m such a baby sometimes, and he is too (most of the time ;P). My 16 year old sister Gloria just had a beautiful baby girl, Eva Inez Aldaco. I’m super excited to have a new baby in the family, yet, I’m very disappointed that my 16 year old sis is the one who brought her into this world. She is so young and naive. I love her and that baby more than life itself, but I’m so scared for her, there is soo much responsibility in raising a child. Life is hard enough for a 16 yr old, but for a 16 yr old with a baby. . . SMH. I haven’t been able to sleep much lately worried about her and the babe. They live with my sister Martha, who btw hates me, and I don’t get to see them everyday. I don’t even get to talk to them everyday.

Hector and I are good, he seems happier since we moved to the beach. Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that we have moved to Lauderdale-by-the-Sea, FL, I live a block south of the Commercial Boulevard Pier right on A1A, on the beach side. 🙂 Makes me smile knowing that we have finally achieved one of our goals together. I care for him like I’ve never cared for anyone, I may not love him like I want to because you can’t make your heart change its beat. He takes care of me, he is an AMAZING lover, and he puts me in my place which can be difficult to manage sometimes. He has known the darkest side of me like no one else, he knows my killer instinct and my fiery passions. . . He is still a mystery to me, I know only what we’ve lived and what he’s carefully selected to tell me. He is indeed an enigma. A puzzle I’m no closer, in 8 years, of putting together. Funny thing is he likes simple things: going to beach, good food, good music, intelligent company and like me, hard-working no excuses and no bullshit friends. Difference is I take a while to decide if someone meets the qualifications of a real friend, he just knows. Must come with age.

Speaking of friends, I find that I have dwindled in the number of people who like my company and that is perfectly fine by me, because the way I see it, I’m a giving person, a good listener as well as a good at vocalizing my thoughts and opinions, I am funny, I’m silly, I’m smart, I’m intelligent, I know who I am, who I love and where I stand in life. It took me a loooong time to get here, what matters now is the friends that are still around. Katherine Messina, Cindy Guzman, Leah Dehler, Zoraley Reid & Zolimar Casablanca(even though they are technically family), D’andra Ortega, Teti Diaz (& associates), and a few recent additions including Sherri Marchese, Kathy Hynes and Cindy Green. There are also those of who I consider my friends which drift in and out merrily and there are just way too many to mention. For the few mentioned and the ones I couldn’t think of, Thank you! For being true unconditional friends with knowledgeable advice and a shoulder when I need it. You are the ones that know what a hurricane my life has been. Now that the dust is beginning to settle, I would like you to know that you are appreciated. To show my appreciation, on my birthday I’m throwing a party were my guests are the recipients of the gifts not me. It’s gift enough for me to have them there with their families.

My life is far from perfect, I fall in love with the unattainable because I believe in the power of positive energy and if you can dream it you can achieve it. For every time I’ve fallen off my cloud, I just got up and dusted off the debris and started climbing again. There is no loss in trying, only in not believing you can achieve it.

 

 

 

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