Ok. So, I know I have said this before, I’m going to say it again, I make mistakes. Not often, but I do i make them big and they usually affect a lot of people around me. . .
Hector is a very intelligent and caring person. He is not very good at expressing his emotions verbally. Hector is a little bit old school. He is a VERY FIRM believer in “Actions speak louder than words.” So, even though you may not hear him say he loves me, I see he does. For a long time I wanted to hear those words more than anything. I wanted that and I wanted roses and candlelit dinners. I wanted valentine’s gifts and birthday gifts and Christmas gifts. I wanted to go out dancing and to be seen with thee love of my life. These are all things a young woman wants.
I realize that even though I want these things, I have been receiving something more valuable than 1,000 dozen roses. I have been getting something better than a Valentine’s gift.
I had Unconditional Love. Love that no matter what idiocy came out of my cake whole, would be there, love that didn’t care if I spent too much money on my nails and hair, love that saw through ALL of my imperfections.
Hector shows me love by ‘trying to fix things’ like when my mom and me fight, when I lose my job, when I lose a friend. We all know he CANNOT fix these things, but he tries. He takes care of me when I’m sick, he pays for things I know I DO NOT need. He’s bought me 2 cars. He moved 15,000 away from his entire family with me to TEXAS.
But I think that the most important thing Hector has done for me is he has changed. He has genuinely become a different person. He has changed me. I see so many things so differently since we’ve been together. I used to say money isn’t everything, he says but it sure helps. LOL
I shared this story with some really young friends of mine: We were eating chinese food one night, there was Jackie P, Ivette, and Fabi, and I started crying like a fool. I cried because I ate the tail end of my eggroll. I explained to them that for 5 years I rarely ate the ends of an eggroll (which by the way I don’t particularly care for) because it was Hector’s favorite part and he always ate it, and I always ate the middle. I missed that.
I know Hector has made me cry more than a few times, the last year had been the hardest. I can honestly say I am really ashamed of myself for ‘giving up’. I am not a quitter. They say that when things get tough the tough get tougher, but Ididn’t I just walked away. Like a coward.
I walked away from the only person IN MY LIFE that has been there for me when NO ONE else was, NO ONE!!!
So, let’s make this clear. I really do Love Hector Ramon Vega Jr. I know I have taken some messed up roads on my journey to realizing that, but they also say that ‘It doesn’t matter what road you take or how fast you go, as long as you get there’.